I wondered this week if I would rather live or die.
I had a beast of a case of the flu, and it took me down. Thankfully, my amazing bone broth slayed the dragon.
It’s been so long since I had so much as a sniffle, no one around me knew how to act. They were all freaked out, and there was this palpable undercurrent of, Ohmygosh… SHE gets sick?
I warned my kids before I arrived home from a trip to L.A. that I wasn’t feeling well, but I don’t think they expected me to actually look sick. Michael, my youngest, looked at me with the most serious eyes, held my hand, and said… “Mom, tell me the truth; do you have Ebola?” As sick as I felt, it took everything in me not to burst into laughter.
Then he said, “I’m putting you to bed.” And he took me upstairs, and tucked me in, and kissed my forehead before leaving the room. It really was adorable. My oldest son, on the other hand, just had one MO: Stay away from deadly germs.
I knew I had a free pass. No one would expect much of me, but it was truly hard for me to shut down. I knew I had to, and I did. But here’s the deal: I love what I do, and my sense of purpose runs through my veins in such a way that I can’t stop doing what I do no matter how hard I try. I’m totally committed to achieving my vision. There is nothing anyone can say or do to derail me.
As I lay in bed, I thought about how grateful I am that I found my purpose, because I know for so many it’s a struggle. I started to think back, and wonder:
How do you find your purpose?
Most of us navigate through life having no clue what we want to do. It’s a struggle almost every adult goes through. The bottom line is this: Some things we do in life are important. Some are unimportant. The important things give our lives meaning and happiness. The unimportant things are just life fillers to kill time. So the question becomes, what can I do with my life that’s important?
When people can’t find their purpose or sense of direction, often times it’s really a matter of finding what’s important to them. They don’t have total clarity on what they fully value. Finding the answer isn’t an easy road, but it may be one of the most important discoveries you’ll ever make in your lifetime.
To find your purpose, you first have to ask yourself these questions:
- Everything involves sacrifice, or a cost. Nothing is sunshine and roses all the time. So in your quest to find purpose, you have to ask yourself this question straight up: How much struggle and sacrifice are you willing to tolerate? Are you willing to handle failure and rejection, and endure hard work and a long wait before you are able to have balance in your life? What unpleasant experiences are you able to handle? Are you able to fall on your face over and over again until you get it right? Decide this, because at some point you will be faced with this decision: Do I keep going?
- Will you allow social or professional pressures to squeeze the passion out of you? We are taught that the only reason to do something is to get X reward. But what if that reward doesn’t come? What if you have to wait for it? What if no one in your life quite understands your vision? Will you show up and do what you are put on this earth to do even if you are not rewarded or understood right away? Will you have blind faith?
- Are you willing to embarrass yourself and be totally vulnerable? If there is something you fantasize about doing but you don’t do it, ask yourself why. Are you willing to follow one of my Primal Laws of not caring what others think of you? When great things unfold, by their very nature they are unique and unconventional. Therefore, to achieve them, we must go against herd mentality… and this is some scary stuff. I’ve puked my fair share over this, but let me say this to you with love: Get. Over. It. When you do your best, and you give something every bit of your creativity and power, then who gives a fig what others think or say about you? Embrace embarrassment. Push past it. Feeling foolish is part of the deal, my friend. The more something scares you, the more meaningful it is. Fear is a big “tell” that you are on your path to purpose.
- Here is something critical to understand: Passion is the result of action, not the cause of it. Finding your passion is a trial-and-error process. Are you willing to go out and hit the trail and find out what it may be? Ask yourself: If someone stuck a gun to your head and said you had to be out of the house all day doing something you love—anything you want—what would it be? Would you write something, invent something, take a class, dance, travel, learn to sail? What is it that you love to do, without everything else weighing you down? Think deeply about this: What are those things that are bigger than yourself and those around you? To find out, you must take action steps and think greater than yourself. Get out of your head and into your heart.
- Ask yourself: Is today the day? Life’s short, and we are here to do something magnificent. What do you want your legacy to be? What do you have to say in life? Work backwards. Thinking about death may have a touch of freak to it, but it actually has value. It forces us to think of what’s important to us.
Your purpose in life is bigger than any goal—it’s your reason for being on the planet. You may have more than one purpose, and your purpose may evolve over time, but it’s basically your reason for existence, so it’s worth investigating.
Finding purpose is also related to a lower risk of Alzheimer’s, stroke, and heart attack—and studies even show that people with purpose enjoy better sex. So if you want to become more resilient and enjoy some healthy primal sex, get on the path to finding your passion. It all matters.
I guarantee you will have total passion for my chocolate almond dip. It’s creamy, delicious, and perfect for dipping. It may be one of my sexiest recipes ever. Dunk and dip oranges, apples, and strawberries. Positively delectable. Check it out here…
Keep thinking big and living bold!